Mr. Grouch

Some people are naturally blessed with a warm, smiling, and inviting face. Some are not. Is it a mood disorder or divine design of that almighty? We may never know.

Yours Truly

I most certainly don’t belong to the “smiling face” category. In fact, many would confidently file me under the exact opposite. I’ve stood before the mirror often enough to accept the verdict—this is how I am. A textbook case of “design intent.” Call me… Mr. Grouch.

Early Encounters with Grouches

I still remember the first Mr. Grouch I encountered—my math tutor in Hutti Gold Mines. He would visit our home to teach my brother and me, ruler in hand. We feared both him and his arithmetic equally. (Spare the rod and spoil the child was gospel in those days.). A good soul with an intimidating countenance.

In contrast, my high school class teacher had a naturally cheerful face, often breaking into hearty laughter. His smile made us feel welcome. Years later, in my professional life, one of my bosses was another classic Mr. Grouch. He had such a perma-frown that fresh flowers seemed to wilt in his presence. But beneath that glowering exterior was a man with a razor-sharp wit and a heart of gold. Destiny had gifted him a mismatch—a cheerful soul hidden behind a grim face.

The Feedback Begins

As I grew older, I began receiving… feedback. Some subtle. Some not.

The Korean Lady

When a Korean family moved into our apartment complex in Chennai, my wife—ever the friendly neighbour—befriended the lady and even began teaching her English. One day, in a moment of innocent curiosity, the lady asked my wife, “Why is your husband so serious all the time? Does he ever smile?”

Ouch. That was the first real indication that my “smile deficit” was noticeable to others.

Mogambo and Me

While working in North India and managing a manufacturing plant, I was given a send-off party as I moved on from that assignment. During the gathering, I noticed two of my junior colleagues giggling in a corner. When I asked them to share the joke, they hesitated, but eventually admitted that whenever I descended the mezzanine stairs to visit the shop floor, the entire place would fall into a hush—as if a villain had entered.

They even gave me a nickname: Mogambo. Yes, the iconic movie villain. Apparently, my exit felt like “Mogambo khush hua” was about to echo through the plant.

Thailand: Land of Smiles

I spent three years working in Thailand—ironically nicknamed the “Land of Smiles.” There I was, sticking out like a sore thumb. Locals called me “Kru Yayi” (ครู  ใหญ่) which loosely translates to “Headmaster.”

Once, professional photographers came to click my official photo. They asked me to smile. Try as I might, my best attempt at a smile looked more like a grimace or a scowl. After a few futile efforts, the photographers gave up, clicked a no-smile version, and packed up.

Nothing much has changed since then. Still struggle to stretch facial muscles.

Coimbatore and the Kural

During my stint in Coimbatore, I often quoted from the Thirukkural. One day, a senior employee—with a mischievous twinkle in her eye—remarked,

“Sir, have you noticed that when you approach, people smile at you?”

Naturally, I puffed up with pride, assuming I was popular. Then came the gut punch. She quoted this Kural:

இடுக்கண் வருங்கால் நகுக அதனை
அடுத்தூர்வது அஃதொப்ப தில்.

“Idukkan varungaal naguga adhanai
Aduththoorvadhu ahdhoppa dhil.”

Roughly translated: “When hardship approaches, laugh at it. Nothing conquers difficulty better than a hearty laugh.”

In other words, I was the difficulty they were smiling at—to cope! Hopefully, said in jest.

The Don

Even my son’s school friends weren’t spared. Their nickname for me? “The Don.” Yes, the mafia kind.

The Don out with the gang & his son

So, Am I Mr. Grouch?

Maybe. In part, I’d say yes. But I’m also just me. My face is what it is. I’ve come to accept it, and I suppose the people around me must, too - “Face it”.

As the saying goes—“You can’t judge a book by its cover.” In my case, maybe it should be:
“You can’t judge a man by his scowl.”

Those of you who know me have the right to vote with these three options as to, if I’m Mr. Grouch. 
Yes / No / Maybe  
Others reserve right to critique.
Looking forward to hearing from you in the comments section ..